In suffering is the abundance

Hello blog. It's been a long time. We have been living in a new city, settling in a new church, growing a new baby - a lot of new! There was a long season of retreat. A time to be quiet, to focus inward, to keep things in my heart. Now it feels time to share. 

The first thing is a song. 

Trials may come
But Jesus is stronger
Trouble may reign
But Jesus is greater
There's a thief come to steal
But Jesus has victory
He has overcome the world  

In his presence
Fear falls away
No power can stand
Against his name
In our suffering
We find perfect peace
Cause Jesus has overcome  

Take  heart, he has overcome
Take courage, he has overcome
Take heart, He has overcome,
He has overcome
He has overcome 

He is light
He is light
He is comfort
He is comfort
He is steadfast
He is sure
He is truth 

You are light
You are light
You are comfort
You are comfort
You are steadfast
You are sure
You are truth 

Take heart, he has overcome the world. Know the bible verse? One morning I had that verse on my mind, studied it for a while in different versions and loved the amplified version.

“I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace. In the world you have tribulation and distress and suffering, but be courageous [be confident, be undaunted, be filled with joy]; I have overcome the world. [My conquest is accomplished, My victory abiding.]”
JOHN 16:33 AMP

Lately I have a new understanding of suffering and trials. 

I always felt that I'd fallen outside of God when things went bad. It's hard to explain.. not fallen outside of God's grace, not outside of love or presence, plan or protection. Just outside. Outside of his fullness. Outside of the way things should be in Him. Outside of the best, the abundance, the life we have in him.

And it felt awful. Disappointing. Depressing. Dark. I needed to get back into what I had fallen out of again. I seemed to fall out all the time. 

I was seeing it all wrong.

I've begun to understand that in life we suffer, the world is broken, things can be super rough, but God is in it with us, pouring out what we need, comforting, loving, present, here.

And that is the abundance. That is fullness. That is life with God. When we suffer we don't fall out of that. We don't need to stop suffering in order to get back into it. Suffering is just part of the abundant life with God.

"In the world you have tribulation and distress and suffering, but be courageous [be confident, be undaunted, be filled with joy]; I have overcome the world.”

This is what it's all about. Jesus has overcome amidst the suffering. Not always overcome the suffering to make it leave. 

I'm embracing suffering better, I feel like I'm in the fullness and purposes of God even during the trials. I am anticipating childbirth again and last time there was a lot of trauma. It is possible the next time won't be smooth either. 

This time, whatever happens, I won't feel like I've fallen out of God and be swamped with all the disappointment and grief that comes with that. Whatever happens, I can look forward to God being with me, providing and comforting during the trials because that is the fullness of life in Him.